The applicant provides two clear reasons motivating the student to pursue graduate study: She then supports those two reasons with examples and analysis.
The applicant provides two clear reasons motivating the student to pursue graduate study: She then supports those two reasons with examples and analysis. The applicant gives thoughtful analysis of the advantages she has been afforded that have allowed her to study music so extensively.
We get the sense that she is insightful and empathetic—qualities that would add greatly to any academic community. This is a strong, serviceable personal statement.
And in truth, given that this for a masters in music composition, other elements of the application like work samples are probably the most important.
However, here are two small changes I would make to improve it: I would probably to split the massive second paragraph into separate paragraphs. Did she think about them during hard practice sessions?
Is she interested in composing music in a style they might have played?
More specific examples here would lend greater depth and clarity to the statement. Are you ready to compose…your personal statement? Want to improve your GRE score by 7 points?
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Try our 5-day full access trial for free: Get a great GRE score. Guaranteed This statement is clearly organized. Almost every paragraph has a distinct focus and message, and when I move on to a new idea, I move on to a new paragraph with a logical transitions.
This statement covers a lot of ground in a pretty short space. I discuss my family history, my goals, my educational background, and my professional background. In addition to including information about my personal motivations, like my family, I also include some analysis about tailoring health interventions with my example of the Zande.
This is a good way to show off what kinds of insights I might bring to the program based on my academic background. My public health recommendation: Grad School Personal Statement Example: For twenty-three years, my grandmother a Veterinarian and an Epidemiologist ran the Communicable Disease Department of a mid-sized urban public health department.
The stories of Grandma Betty doggedly tracking down the named sexual partners of the infected are part of our family lore. Grandma Betty would persuade people to be tested for sexually transmitted diseases, encourage safer sexual practices, document the spread of infection and strive to contain and prevent it.
Indeed, due to the large gay population in the city where she worked, Grandma Betty was at the forefront of the AIDS crises, and her analysis contributed greatly towards understanding how the disease was contracted and spread.
My grandmother has always been a huge inspiration to me, and the reason why a career in public health was always on my radar. This is an attention-grabbing opening anecdote that avoids most of the usual cliches about childhood dreams and proclivities.
This story also subtly shows that I have a sense of public health history, given the significance of the AIDs crisis for public health as a field. Recent years have cemented that interest. In Januarymy parents adopted my little brother Fred from China.
If I were to take another pass through this paragraph, the main thing I would change is the last phrase. It is not right that some people have access to the best doctors and treatment while others have no medical care. I want to pursue an MPH in Sociomedical Sciences at Columbia because studying social factors in health, with a particular focus on socio-health inequities, will prepare me to address these inequities.Personal Statement Examples for Graduate School.
Writing a personal statement for graduate school may at first seem like an overwhelming task. Together with your rigorous academic program and support, I believe I can do that as a member of the XYZ Engineering school community. This I Believe is an international organization engaging people in writing and sharing essays describing the core values that guide their daily lives.
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Personal Statement Examples for Graduate School. Writing a personal statement for graduate school may at first seem like an overwhelming task. Together with your rigorous academic program and support, I believe I can do that as a member of the XYZ Engineering school community. 4 SAMPLE GRADUATE SCHOOL ESSAYS #1.
"From Working Poor to Elite Scholar" One of the proudest accomplishments of my life was earning my college . Writing Your Graduate School Application Essay thousands – of other essays. In this handout, you will learn how to show these busy readers that you will I believe my knowledge base, skills and motivation for research make me a great contribution to Carnegie Mellon’s electrical and computer engineering research group.